Drroogh Posted August 2, 2019 Report Share Posted August 2, 2019 So, a co-worker who is originally from Wisconsin, has over the years built a list of quotes from our Southern Brethren co-workers. Today he sent over an updated list. Presented here for your reading enjoyment! Quote " I daknow dat guy from Adam's housecat." "Whaduya thank, wa're Burga Kang down hare! Ya'll kayn't hay'v everthang ya'lls way"! "That's a pretty big seat that he won't be able to fill" "Dats lika rattlesnayk wita brokted off tayl" "That thing will blow the hare off a dawg" "Sitround and git tight-asa tic" " The densification of the foam….." "Good mornin' frawg lips, dis isyer hero talkin'" "Yeh right! - Melton will retire right after he starts workin" (Melton is my boss who is actually the originator of probably 85% of these quotes, Great Guy and Great boss, but definitely a character from Alabama!) "I've gotch ya'll hed tuu hed lika coupla sho dawgs" "I said two days notch, but I didn't say starting from what day!!" "Every assumption I have ever made about how this place should run, has been wrong!" "I dun walk back many a year, whens I step tru da door here." "Da only taim ya'll wilt ever sees me a smokin again, is if I dunn catch on fore!!" "I'm sure glad I don't work for…… anymore; - Cause he knows everything" "You might be the head of the house, but your wife is the neck!" "This farming stuff out, is getting to be a lot of work" (Outsourcing) "Dat thang is lika da bottum of da ocean, its flat asa flitter" "I don't wana hear any of dis " It's close Business"…...and ah…...But ah!" " JOHN BLAIN….???? "Fintegrity - +/- 0.2mm" "Anytang is doable, just pends on how ya'll do it" "Wen it come toa freed meal, ain't nuttin stannin tween me an dem grosserees! "Whar ever dar's a crack…you's follar it" "CMM - Capital Mis-Management" "Dis ain't duh probum….duh probum is da solushun" "Hez got is butt ina crack, an heez tryin' to get id out" "Ya'll cain't maka silk purse outuva sow's ear" "She'll worry da horns offa birrygoat" "I'll slap da shine offa dat head" "Dem wings do wurk, ya jusgotta flapum" "Dats average as grits" " Let's put dat worm in da water an see how it swims!" " It's like a freight train getting ready ta take a dirt road" "I goes whar I want to, Im kinda like da office dawg" " Let it sink like a jellyfish" " Is that Mike-anese?" " Throwing rocks and then running in the house" " All he'll do is a roof watch during a tornado" " Ya jus gotta kick da dog that bit cha" "Like a bead in a buket" "This is it right here Rosco', don't even bother lookin' I'm on it Like a Rat on a Cheeto' "after workin here at …. I know exactly how Sisyphus felt" " yeah, dat cat don’t got a climbin tree" I don’t think he's got nuff sense ta tote a bucket a water up a hill" The best part a him run down his daddy's leg Like a fox sniffin roun da henhouse If you all gonna be stupid, you'd better be tough. I don’t wanna haf ta jump through da fiery hoops a hell again It's jus like a pancake, it's got two sides. if if's and but's were candy and nuts, it would be christmas all year long. If ya paint y"alls picture with water colors, ya don’t need to piss on y'alls work dares nordern shuga an dares southern shuga.Unlike dem nordern boys,we southern boys knows how ta grine ar cane. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zlinedavid Posted August 4, 2019 Report Share Posted August 4, 2019 My brain shut down halfway through.....and I live in Kentucky. Good luck to the normal folks out there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rico Posted August 4, 2019 Report Share Posted August 4, 2019 "Another job, well........it's done."---Construction worker Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
milehiiu Posted August 4, 2019 Report Share Posted August 4, 2019 "We often miss opportunity, because it's dressed in overalls, and looks like work."....... Thomas A. Edison. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jefftheref Posted August 4, 2019 Report Share Posted August 4, 2019 Being late for work is like being pregnant. You either are or you ain't! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jefftheref Posted August 4, 2019 Report Share Posted August 4, 2019 Inspect what you expect. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parakeet Jones Posted August 4, 2019 Report Share Posted August 4, 2019 Here are a few from my job. Remember I am a teacher. “Do we have to spell this right on the spelling test?” Student: “Have you been to that one place where that one girl was killed?” long awkward silence Me: “No, I haven’t made it there yet.” Student: “It’s cool you should go.” “Mom and Dad got in a fight this morning because Mom dyed her hair blonde and Dad said it made her look like a hooker.” Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
milehiiu Posted August 4, 2019 Report Share Posted August 4, 2019 "When he worked. He really worked. When he played. He really played."......Dr. Seuss. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drroogh Posted August 4, 2019 Author Report Share Posted August 4, 2019 One a friend of mine and I had about management at a prior workplace. "Their pretty heads up!" Interpretation, they got their head where the sun don't shine! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IUFLA Posted August 5, 2019 Report Share Posted August 5, 2019 The required phraseology for a PAR (Precision Approach Radar) prior to an aircraft beginning final descent: "Approaching glidepath, wheels should be down" A good friend of mine running a PAR on his final day in the USAF: "Approaching the glide, prepare to slide, booties should be down and laced." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zlinedavid Posted August 5, 2019 Report Share Posted August 5, 2019 The background on my often unused 2nd monitor has this as a background: "Chaos is the law of nature. Order is the dream of man." Translation is the old military operations quote: even the best plans don't survive first contact. Don't fear it, embrace it. Chaos is when you learn the most. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rico Posted August 5, 2019 Report Share Posted August 5, 2019 This one is from a disgruntled trailer factory worker at the bar explaining his job to me... "They give me a bunch of empty beer cans and expect me to build a Cadillac with them." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steubenhoosier Posted August 5, 2019 Report Share Posted August 5, 2019 Sign in the break room at my office-- "Coffee is for closers" No one here to enforce that rule, so in fact checking that statement, I'd say it is inaccurate. Heck, anyone can have coffee Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IUFLA Posted August 5, 2019 Report Share Posted August 5, 2019 Back when (2013) we were trying to implement new air traffic software where I work, somebody wrote down on a white board exchanges between the controller and software engineers for posterity. I checked and they were still there today... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rico Posted August 5, 2019 Report Share Posted August 5, 2019 1 hour ago, Steubenhoosier said: Sign in the break room at my office-- "Coffee is for closers" No one here to enforce that rule, so in fact checking that statement, I'd say it is inaccurate. Heck, anyone can have coffee Kind of along the lines of...."Sprinkles are for winners." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zlinedavid Posted August 5, 2019 Report Share Posted August 5, 2019 2 hours ago, IUFLA said: I have no idea what the hell this actually means, but I'm using this line. If only to confuse people. Pure gold. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rico Posted August 5, 2019 Report Share Posted August 5, 2019 25 minutes ago, Zlinedavid said: I have no idea what the hell this actually means, but I'm using this line. If only to confuse people. Pure gold. Think big "birds". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrflynn03 Posted August 5, 2019 Report Share Posted August 5, 2019 Not really a work quote but me and one of my coworkers once called the office secretary, who was hispanic and barely adequately spoke English, to page Richard Cranium to one of the production areas. Afterwards there was a lot of, so and so is being a real Richard today. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drroogh Posted August 5, 2019 Author Report Share Posted August 5, 2019 Remember there was a message written on one of the bathroom stalls, near the electrical engineering department. Complete with an artistic replication of a satellite dish sending messages to the universe "186,282 miles per second, not just a good idea, but the law!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drroogh Posted August 5, 2019 Author Report Share Posted August 5, 2019 29 minutes ago, mrflynn03 said: Not really a work quote but me and one of my coworkers once called the office secretary, who was hispanic and barely adequately spoke English, to page Richard Cranium to one of the production areas. Afterwards there was a lot of, so and so is being a real Richard today. So had a co-worker who went by Dick, (known for his dry humor) one day I was asking our office manager , (next to Dick's cubicle), about something. She answered, "well Dick Knows" to which he immediately replied " I can't believe you just let her call you that!" needless to say she was completely embarrassed but also laughing. Gone are the days of off color jokes in this day and age of PC! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rico Posted August 5, 2019 Report Share Posted August 5, 2019 46 minutes ago, mrflynn03 said: Not really a work quote but me and one of my coworkers once called the office secretary, who was hispanic and barely adequately spoke English, to page Richard Cranium to one of the production areas. Afterwards there was a lot of, so and so is being a real Richard today. Well she could have paged Mike Hunt!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drroogh Posted August 5, 2019 Author Report Share Posted August 5, 2019 2 minutes ago, rico said: Well she could have paged Mike Hunt!!!!!! That's so old the moss growing on it already died! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rico Posted August 5, 2019 Report Share Posted August 5, 2019 3 minutes ago, Drroogh said: That's so old the moss growing on it already died! That's what she shed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zlinedavid Posted August 5, 2019 Report Share Posted August 5, 2019 6 minutes ago, rico said: Well she could have paged Mike Hunt!!!!!! Or Ben Dover. Or Peter Gozinya, or either of his brother, Dick and Willie. Or Emmanuel Foch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zlinedavid Posted August 5, 2019 Report Share Posted August 5, 2019 30 minutes ago, Drroogh said: So had a co-worker who went by Dick, (known for his dry humor) one day I was asking our office manager , (next to Dick's cubicle), about something. She answered, "well Dick Knows" to which he immediately replied " I can't believe you just let her call you that!" needless to say she was completely embarrassed but also laughing. Gone are the days of off color jokes in this day and age of PC! Oh in my office they're alive and well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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